tg.wizardfirstrule-第138部分

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　if　he　needed　it　on　the　spot　and　she　didn't　want　blood　in　her　room；　and　for　when　she　wanted　to　leave　him　hanging　all　night。　She　promised　him　he　would　be　spending　a　great　deal　of　time　in　the　little　room。
　
　She　had　him　drag　the　tub　to　the　foot　of　her　bed。　He　took　the　bucket　from　the　tub　and　was　instructed　where　to　go　for　hot　water。　He　was　to　speak　to　no　one；　even　if　spoken　to；　and　he　was　to　run；　there　and　back；　so　her　bathwater　wouldn't　get　cold　before　the　tub　was　filled。　She　told　him　that　if　he　didn't　follow　her　instructions　exactly　while　out　of　her　sight；　the　pain　of　the　magic　would　take　him　down；　and　if　she　had　to　e　looking　for　him；　he　would　be　very　sorry　he　had　disappointed　her。　He　swore　his　solemn　oath　to　do　as　she　manded。　The　place　where　the　hot　water　came　from；　a　hot　spring　in　a　pool　surrounded　by　white　marble　seats；　was　a　goodly　distance。　He　was　sweating　and　exhausted　by　the　time　he　had　the　tub　filled。
　
　While　she　sat　soaking　in　the　tub　Richard　scrubbed　her　back；　brushed　her　hair　out；　and　helped　her　wash　it。
　
　Denna　draped　her　arms　over　the　sides　of　the　tub；　put　her　head　back；　and　closed　her　eyes；　relaxing；　while　he　knelt　next　to　her；　in　case　she　wanted　anything。　〃You　don't　like　Constance；　do　you？〃
　
　Richard　didn't　know　how　to　answer。　He　didn't　want　to　say　anything　bad　about　her　friend；　but　lying　would　get　him　punished；　too。　〃I　am　。　。　。　afraid　of　her；　Mistress　Denna。〃
　
　Denna　smiled　with　her　eyes　still　closed。　〃Clever　answer；　my　love。　You　aren't　trying　to　be　flip；　are　you？〃
　
　〃No；　Mistress　Denna。　I　told　you　the　truth。〃
　
　〃Good。　You　should　be　afraid　of　her。　She　hates　men。　Every　time　she　kills　one；　she　cries　out　the　name　of　the　man　who　first　broke　her；　Rastin。　Remember　I　told　you　about　the　man　who　broke　me；　took　me　for　his　mate；　and　that　later　I　killed　him？　Before　he　broke　me；　he　was　Constance's　trainer。　His　name　was　Rastin。　It　was　he　who　broke　her。　Constance　is　the　one　who　told　me　how　I　could　kill　him。　I　would　do　anything　for　her。　And　because　I　killed　the　man　she　hated　so；　she　would　do　anything　for　me。〃
　
　〃Yes；　Mistress　Denna。　But　Mistress　Denna；　please　don't　leave　me　alone　with　her？〃
　
　〃I　suggest　you　be　very　attentive　to　your　duties。　If　you　are；　and　you　do　not　earn　too　much　time；　I　will　remain　when　she　is　training…you。　You　see？　You　see　how　lucky　you　are　to　have　a　kind　mistress？〃
　
　〃Yes；　Mistress　Denna；　thank　you　for　teaching　me。　You　are　a　gifted　teacher。〃　She　opened　one　eye；　as　if　to　check　his　face　for　a　trace　of　a　smirk。　There　was　none。
　
　〃Get　me　a　towel；　and　lay　my　nightclothes　on　the　table　by　the　bed。〃
　
　Richard　helped　towel　her　hair　dry。　Denna　didn't　put　on　her　nightclothes；　but　lay　back　on　the　bed　with　her　damp　hair　spread　out　on　the　pillow。
　
　〃Go　blow　out　the　lamp　on　the　table　over　there。〃　He　went　immediately　and　blew　out　the　flame。　〃Bring　me　the　Agiel；　my　love。〃
　
　Richard　flinched。　He　hated　it　when　she　had　him　fetch　the　Agiel；　touching　it　hurt。　Fearing　the　result　of　hesitation　more；　he　gritted　his　teeth　and　snatched　it　up；　holding　it　in　the　open　palms　of　his　hands。　The　pain　of　it　vibrated　in　his　elbows　and　shoulders。　He　could　hardly　wait　for　her　to　take　it。　She　had　propped　up　the　pillows　against　the　headboard　and　was　sitting　up　a　little；　watching　him。　He　let　out　a　deep　breath　when　she　picked　it　out　of　his　hand。
　
　〃Mistress　Denna；　why　doesn't　it　hurt　you　to　touch　it？〃
　
　〃It　does；　same　as　you。　It　hurts　me　to　touch　it　because　it　is　the　one　used　to　train　me。〃
　
　His　eyes　opened　wide。　〃You　mean；　the　whole　time　you　hold　it；　it　hurts　you？　The　whole　time　you　are　training　me？〃
　
　She　nodded；　rolling　it　in　her　fingers；　looking　away　from　his　eyes　for　a　second。　She　gave　him　a　little　frown　and　smile。　〃There　is　rarely　a　time　I　am　without　pain；　of　one　kind　or　another。　That　is　one　reason　the　training　of　a　Mord…Sith　takes　years…to　learn　to　handle　the　pain。　I　guess　it's　also　why　only　women　are　Mord…Sith；　men　are　too　weak。　The　chain　around　my　wrist　allows　me　to　let　it　hang；　it　doesn't　hurt　when　it　hangs　by　the　chain。　But　while　I　use　it　on　someone；　it　causes　constant　pain。〃
　
　〃I　never　knew。〃　Richard's　insides　knotted　in　anguish。　〃I'm　sorry；　Mistress　Denna。　I'm　sorry　it　hurts　you；　that　you　must　suffer　to　teach　me。〃
　
　〃Pain　can　bring　pleasure　all　its　own；　my　love。　That's　one　of　the　things　I'm　teaching　you。　And　it's　time　for　another　lesson。〃　Her　eyes　glided　up　and　down　him。　〃Enough　talk。〃
　
　Richard　recognized　the　look　in　her　eyes；　the　quickening　of　her　breathing。　〃But；　Mistress　Denna；　you've　just　bathed；　and　I'm　all　sweaty。〃
　
　A　small　smile　came　to　one　side　of　her　mouth。　〃I　like　your　sweat。〃
　
　With　her　eyes　locked　on　his；　she　put　the　Agiel　between　her　teeth。
　
　…＋
　
　The　days　passed　with　a　numbing　sameness。　Richard　didn't　mind　the　devotions；　because　he　wasn't　being　trained；　hurt。　But　he　hated　saying　the　words；　and　had　to　concentrate　on　Denna's　braid　the　whole　of　the　time　he　chanted。　Chanting　the　same　thing；　hour　after　hour；　on　his　knees　with　his　head　against　the　floor　tiles；　was　hardly　less　onerous　than　the　training。　Richard　found　himself　waking　at　night；　or　in　the　morning；　chanting　the　words。　Master　Rahl　guide　us。　Master　Rahl　teach　us。　Master　Rahl　protect　us。　In　your　light　we　thrive。　In　your　mercy　we　are　sheltered。　In　your　wisdom　we　are　humbled。　We　live　only　to　serve。　Our　lives　are　yours。
　
　Denna　didn't　wear　the　red　anymore；　instead；　she　wore　white　leather。　She　told　him　it　was　a　gesture　that　said　he　was　broken；　had　been　taken　for　a　mate；　and　that　to　show　her　power　over　him　she　chose　not　to　make　him　bleed。　Constance　didn't　like　it。　It　didn't　make　much　difference　to　Richard；　the　Agiel　felt　the　same　whether　it　drew　blood　or　not。　Constance　was　with　Denna　about　half　the　time；　occasionally　going　off　to　train　a　new　pet。　Constance　became　more　and　more　insistent　about　being　left　alone　with　Richard；　but　Denna　wouldn't　permit　it。　Constance　threw　her　all　into　his　training。　The　more　Richard　saw　of　her；　the　more　terrified　he　became　of　her。　Denna　smiled　at　him　whenever　she　told　Constance　to　take　over。
　
　One　day；　after　the　afternoon　devotion；　when　Constance　had　gone　off　to　train　someone　else；　Denna　took　him　back　to　the　little　room　adjacent　to　her　quarters　for　his　afternoon　training。　She　hoisted　him　up　by　the　rope　until　he　was。　hardly　able　to　touch　the　floor。
　
　〃Mistress　Denna；　with　your　permission；　would　you　allow　Mistress　Constance　to　do　all　my　training　from　now　on？〃　His　question　had　an　effect　he　hadn't　expected。　It　enraged　her。　She　stared　at　him；　her　face　turning　a　deep　red；　then　she　started　hitting　him　with　the　Agiel；　driving　it　into　him；　screaming　at　him；　telling　him　how　worthless　he　was；　how　insignificant；　how　she　was　sick　of　his　talking。　Denna　was　strong；　and　she　beat　him　with　the　Agiel　as　hard　as　she　could。　It　went　on　and　on。
　
　Richard　couldn't　remember　her　being　so　angry；　so　severe；　so　cruel。　Soon　he　couldn't　remember　anything；　even　where　he　was。　He　convulsed　in　pain。　He　couldn't　say　anything　or　beg　her　to　stop；　or　even　breathe　most　of　the　time。　She　never　slowed　or　let　up。　She　just　seemed　to　get　angrier　as　she　hurt　him。　He　saw　blood　on　the　floor；　a　lot　of　blood。　It　splattered　all　over　her　white　leather。　Her　chest　heaved　with　her　effort；　her　rage。　Her　braid　came　loose。
　
　Denna　grabbed　his　hair　and　yanked　his　head　back。　She　gave　him　no　warning。　She　drove　the　Agiel　in　his　ear　harder　than　she　ever　had。　She　did　it　again　and　again。　Time　distorted　into　eternity。　He　no　longer　knew　who　he　was；　or　what　was　happening。　He　no　longer　tried　to　beg；　to　cry；　to　hold　on。
　
　She　stopped；　standing　next　to　him；　panting　in　ire。　〃I'm　going　to　dinner。〃　He　felt　the　agony　of　the　magic　e　on　in　him。　He　gasped；　his　eyes　going　wide。　〃While　I'm　gone；　and　I'm　going　to　take　my　time；　I've　leaving　the　pain　of　the　magic　on　you。　You　will　not　be　able　to　pass　out；　or　to　stop　it。　If　you　let　the　anger　get　away　from　you；　it　will　make　the　pain　worse。　And　it　will　get　away　from　you。　I　promise。〃
　
　She　went　to　the　wall　and　hoisted　the　rope　up　until　his　feet　were　off　the　floor。　Richard　cried　out。　His　arms　felt　as　if　they　would　be　torn　out。
　
　〃Enjoy　yourself。〃　She　turned　on　her　heels　and　left。
　
　Richard　balanced　on　the　edge　of　sanity　and　madness；　the　suffering　twisting　in　him；　making　him　unable　to　control　the　anger；　as　she　had　promised。　The　flames　of　his　hurt　consumed　him。　It　was　somehow　worse　that　she　wasn't　there。　He　had　never　felt　so　alone；　so　helpless；　and　the　pain　wouldn't　even　let　him　cry；　he　could　only　gasp　in　agony。
　
　He　had　no　idea　how　long　he　was　left　alone。　He　was　aware　only　of　suddenly　dropping　to　the　floor；　then　Denna's　boots　to　either　side　of　his　head　as　she　stood　over　him。　She　turned　off　the　pain　of　the　magic；　but　his　arms　were　still　clamped　helplessly　behind　his　back；　and　the　burning　inferno　of　pain　in　his　shoulders　didn't　extinguish。　He　cried　against　the　blood　on　the　floor　as　she　stood　over　him。
　
　〃I　told　you　before；〃　she　hissed　through　gritted　teeth；　〃you　are　my　mate　for　life。〃　He　could　hear　her　heavy　breathing；　the　rage　in　her。　〃Before　I　begin　doing　worse　to　you；　and　you　are　no　longer　able　to　speak；　I　want　you　to　tell　me　why　you　asked　to　have…Constance　train　you　instead　of　me。〃
　
　He　coughed　up　blood；　trying　to　speak。
　
　〃That　is　not　the　way　you　talk　to　me！　On　your　knees！　Now！〃
　
　He　tried　to　get　to　his　knees；　but　with　his　arms　behind　his　back；　he　was　unable　to。　Denna　took　a　fistful　of　his　hair　and　pulled　him　up。　Dizzy；　he　fell　against　her；　his　face　against　the　wet　blood　on　her　belly。　His　blood。
　
　She　pushed　him　away　from　her　with　the　tip　of　the　Agiel　against　his　forehead。　That　brought　his　eyes　open。　He　looked　up　at　her；　to　answer。
　
　Denna　backhanded　him　across　the…mouth。　〃Look　at　the　ground　when　you　speak　to　me！　No　one　gave　you　permission　to　look　at　me！〃　Richard　looked　down　at　her　boots。　〃You're　running　out　of　time！　Answer　the　question！〃
　
　Richard　coughed　up　more　blood；　it　ran　down　his　chin；　and　he　had　to　struggle　to　keep　from　vomiting。　〃Because；　Mistress　Denna；〃　he　said　hoarsely；　〃I　know　it　hurts　you　to　hold　the　Agiel。　I　know　it　hurts　you　to　train　me。　I　wanted　Mistress　Constance　to　do　it；　to　spare　you　the　pain。　I　don't　want　you　to　hurt。　I　know　what　it　feels　like　to　hurt；　you　have　taught　m